You remember me Buddy? I’m the guy who helped you and then you turned around and just shit all over my life. Now I don’t want to hurt you and I’m going to let you go, but there’s something I want you to know before I do. So sit the hell down or so help me I’m going to take this pipe off my shoulder and start swinging for fences.
Good, now listen.
Some people get glass ceilings on their way up, something they don’t know is there until they bump into it. Me, the only regular roof I’d ever had over my head is neon and it’s followed me around my entire life. And you know it’s amazing what you can get used to if you don’t care.
But two years ago my friend goes and shares his drugs with the wrong people. And maybe I shouldn’t have, but he’s got kids and needed his job, so I took the rap. Probation and rehab for a guy with no wife, no kids, and no habit was a breeze. It was a little hard to get another job but I did and put it all behind me.
Then last year I lost my temper a little with my brother in-law. Fact is the people who were supposed to stop him from beating on my little sister all had some reason why they really couldn’t do it. So I got anger management and community service. Now it’s very hard to get another job, and by the time I do get one I’m really pretty mad about this whole roof thing.
But I’d just started my fifth new gig last week when something funny happened. I was speeding down the road in my new boss’ brand new truck chasing after this Lexus and I suddenly just knew it was going to end badly for me. Oh, I didn’t know how yet, but I was thinking I already knew why. People out there think I’m trash. They think I live as trash and that someday I’ll die as trash. They’re okay with sticking it to me because I don’t know how to climb the ladders you all have on the other side of my roof.
Then I think maybe’s there’s something to that ‘cause my best friend figured it out how to do it, he’s got a great a job now. He’s also a little more careful with his drugs, but that’s only based on what I hear. Apparently I’m too low on his ladder now for even a phone call hello. ‘Course there’s some like my sister. Much as I love her I’m not sure she’s ever gonna climb up from her shitty husband. And then there’s people like my boss who seem born with a plus size ladder up their ass. He didn’t see your Lexus driving down the road or your kid hanging out the back door. And since he’s insisting that I tried to steal his car–
No, no, shhh. I’m sure you have a very good reason why you lied. But I helped you, you lied, and now it doesn’t matter what your reason is. Everybody’s got reasons for the less than stellar stunts they pull, and they all think they’re pretty good reasons. That’s the system, see, your reasons only ever have to be good enough for you, my reasons only ever have to be good enough for me. And that’s my point, see? That’s just what I realized in my boss’ truck: you and me have our good enough’s going different directions.
I’ve been swimming along in your toilet bowl here, always doing the right thing as best I can, while you people up there put your ladders on top of roofs like mine and haven’t got a clue what you’re doing to people down here. So, today I decided to pull you down and tell you. You were my last strike, Buddy, my last nail. You finished off my neon roof and now all you and your people are ever going to do when you look down at me is see that nice bright warning roof over a box of toxic sewer trash.
Well I got news for you Buddy. No box can hold you down if you get the right tools.  And when I get out of this box, I’m going to be standing there at the bottom of all your specially laid ladders taking a real hard look at your system while I still have those right tools in my hands. Then you and your people up there better hope and pray we all still think ‘up’ is in the same direction.
Thanks for your time Buddy. I hope you climb… really far.